Everyone Knows I’m a Good Man

In the next few days, Ji Changze calmly helped (tortured) the team members and the two supernatural beings.

Wang Can is half-dead in learning optics, and the flying superpower is not much better. He also has to learn atmospheric pressure, and how to judge at which altitude he can operate with ease, and at which altitude his body will be affected.

And when he swoops down from the air, can he gain momentum when using weapons, and will he be bounced back?

Also, because he could fight at high altitude, he was required to learn n-u arrows.

The flying superpower who almost fell down after practicing all kinds of exercises was quite puzzled: "Boss, who am I going to shoot when I learn n-u arrows? There is no one for me to shoot."

Ji Changze glanced at him and said, "Let's beat those with abilities like you who are causing trouble."

He said, "...We are all superpowers, maybe we are in the same group. This is not good."

"No problem, you can choose not to learn. I'm very easy-going."

"Either you fight the superpower, or I fight you. I respect your choice."

stranger"……"

"I suddenly feel that I really want to learn n-u archery. Let me learn it, boss. If I don't learn it, I will feel uncomfortable."

After studying for a day, he became paralyzed again.

"Boss, aren't you learning n-u archery? Why should I do anaerobic exercise?"

Ji Changze "Train your arms. You need to use your arms when using n-u arrows."

"But I also trained my legs..."

"Practice your legs well and run away if you can't beat them. Escape will be more powerful."

"...What about the buttocks? I did a butt bridge today, and my buttocks... oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, it hurts so much."

"When you run out of n-u arrows, you can fall from the sky and kill the opponent."

stranger"……"

His whole body was throbbing with pain, and he lay on the ground like a dead dog, unable to move anywhere but his mouth.

When Wang Can came to see him, he struggled to force out his voice, "I seriously doubt... the boss is retaliating."

Wang Can; "The boss is just retaliating."

Flying superpower "???"

Wang Can: "Don't worry, this is the way the boss likes to value someone. Of course, this does not conflict with his retaliation. But don't worry, I have experience. Soon you won't have to be watched by the boss every day."

Hearing this, the flying superpower raised his head with difficulty, his face full of hope. "You mean that the boss won't torment me like this after being fresh for two days?"

He complained bitterly, "I've really had enough. This is much harder than studying. Not only do I have to memorize some messy information, but I also have to do various exercises. Moreover, the other elder brothers also laugh at me. As for the boss, he changes his mind every day." No matter how hard you try, Wang Can, it’s better for you. You’re the only one here to comfort me. You were the first to welcome me when I first came here.”

"So how many days will the boss torture me until I don't feel fresh anymore?"

Wang Can felt a little guilty as he listened to his new friend Balabala, "No, I mean that once there is a new leader, the attention will naturally be transferred to the new person."

"So you just have to wait for the new guy to mess with the boss."

Flying superpower "..."

Wang Can looked at his increasingly thoughtful gaze and felt guilty for a few seconds before feeling confident again, "Yes, that's what I thought. Before you came, I was tormented by the boss, not the one who valued you. So you I will give you a special welcome as soon as you arrive.”

After saying that, he added, "Of course, my friendship for you is true."

Flying Superpower "...If you didn't snicker, I might still believe you."

The boat of friendship was overturned at every turn. The flying superpower took back his emotions and began to look forward to the day and night that an unruly superpower would appear and provoke Ji Changze.

However, recently, the superpowers have been competing against each other (Wang Can shared in the group that Ji Changze was called to work overtime at night, and almost beat the troublemaker half to death. They are afraid that they will be beaten half to death next time. ), but many strange creatures emerged.

A three-headed snake hidden in a tree almost swallowed the head of an ordinary resident.

After Ji Changze arrived at the scene, he beat down half of the opponent's three snakeheads.

——The news report given was that a python escaped from the zoo and almost attacked humans. Fortunately, a passerby (Ji Changze) acted bravely and subdued the python with his bare hands and sent it back to the zoo.

A bunch of black social bats went around sucking blood and knocked out an ordinary person.

——Ji Changze went over and pulled out their teeth one by one, and tore off their wings. Finally, he gave the news that someone secretly raised giant vampire bats from a certain country and was now in jail.

However, when the onlookers got the news and went to take pictures, they found that each of the giant bats captured by the police officers was wilted, their wings were folded in abnormal postures, and some were even spitting out from their mouths. Green spit (blood).

In response, the official response was that these bats were alien species and were not well adapted to China's ecology, so they were somewhat wilted.

In the following days, the foreign security team fully witnessed their leader's combat effectiveness.

It can spray venom to attack the winged shells of humans, and the wings will be torn off.

The tentacled monster was covered in mucus and was looking for parasites. Only one of its tentacles was cut off.

There is also an object that is suspected of being A Piao wandering around, boasting that he wants to eat ninety-nine beautiful women. Because the leader is a firm materialist and firmly believes that A Piao cannot exist in the world, he just dragged him to do a series of experiments.

He refused to use garlic, glutinous rice, crosses, or the charms bought by a certain treasure.

He had to choose to deal with the opponent like a living creature, so he beat Ah Piao all over with a wooden warehouse, and then used a bomb to blow it up. Seeing that the opponent was still okay, he was so angry that he dragged him up. A boxing ring set up in the yard.

As a result, this Ah Piao was burned by the sun.

Before he died, he was still screaming, "I am a ghost!! Even if you kill me, I will be a ghost too!!".

Having to prove one's identity in the end is quite tragic.

It's a pity that her death was in vain. The boss didn't think that Ah Piao was killed by the sun. Instead, he firmly believed that he punched the person too hard and killed him. As for why he melted...

"There must be a poison we didn't find hidden in her body. It's a colorless and odorless drug that can turn corpses into nothingness. You've all seen the martial arts dramas. Bone-Transforming Palm and Bone-Transforming Water all have this effect."

The team members who heard Ji Changze's remarks "..."

But aren’t the Bone-Resolving Mianzhang and the Bone-Resolving Water both fabricated and non-existent?

How can you believe this? You just don’t believe that Ah Piao really exists.

The team members complained a lot in their hearts, but no one dared to say to Ji Changze in front of him, "Boss, don't think about it. That's Ah Piao. Our world has long been unscientific. The leaders have said it's unscientific. Why are you insisting on it?" .

They are afraid that after they say it, they will die scientifically before they realize that the world is gradually becoming unscientific.

Anyway, since the A Piao incident, everyone in the foreign security team has realized how ferocious Ji Changze is, and everyone has been studying and progressing according to his requirements, loving life, science, and labor.

Occasionally, they go out to deal with unnatural creatures. To their relief, these things appear during the day, usually in the morning. This is when Ji Changze is at his best. He is no longer angry or irritable when he goes on a mission. He cursed people everywhere like a firecracker, and he was in a good mood while humming when fighting monsters.

Of course, there have been many cases where monsters were driven crazy by his leisurely humming mode, and then were beaten violently by their leader until they were subdued.

On this day, they were once again called out for a mission.

A humanoid zombie with a green face and fangs that is extremely powerful and bites people. Because the team members have rich experience in fighting against this unnatural creature, they pulled up the iron net and subdued the opponent directly.

Ji Changze was eating melon seeds while watching, euphemistically saying that he was training the team members and checking their learning results.

In the end, the iron net didn't stop the zombie. This guy had long teeth and long nails. Not only were they long, but they were also extremely hard. He just used brute force to tear the iron net open, and he came towards a few people with great ferocity.

"Holy shit, shit, it's coming, it's coming, open the warehouse quickly!!"

"I don't have a gun here. There are people watching over there and we can't let them hear the sound of the wooden warehouse. Which of you brought a gun?"

"Come here, come here, oh my god, luckily I rolled fast, this guy can break the stone with one slap."

A group of people were fighting passionately and there were many dangers, but their leader was leaning against a tree and eating melon seeds leisurely.

Don't forget to add a sentence from time to time: "Poke his eyes, if his eyes are green, he deserves a beating."

"Hey, stupid, you try to stop his leg when he rolls on the spot. If your claws fall to the ground, won't they be like a poisonous snake with its teeth pulled out?"

"Back behind, this thing is very fast, you have to pay attention to him going around behind, click, click, click."

"Kacha kacha, who is it? Stop beating me now. You can't run anymore and you're spanking me. You go out and buy me some melon seeds. I've finished eating these melon seeds."

"Xiao Qi, it's you, eh! Where are my peanuts? Who stole my peanuts??"

Wang Can, who was assigned the task of recording, quickly came over with a camera, "Boss, Peanut is in the car."

"Who is that? Go get peanuts from the car for me first and then buy melon seeds."

I don’t know if it’s because Ji Changze’s unique temperament is too obvious, or if he’s too talkative and never stops talking, or maybe it’s because he doesn’t look tall or strong and is easy to bully. The zombies that the two team members were fighting suddenly spun in the air, staring directly at Ji Changze with green eyes, and jumped over with a cry.

Then, he was beaten violently.

Just being beaten up is not the worst thing. The worst thing is that in order to give a scientific explanation to the onlookers who saw the humanoid object biting people, Ji Changze held the pliers, fixed the zombie's brain with one hand, and used the other hand to remove the super long super-long body. The sharp fangs were pulled out one by one.

"Okay, okay, it'll be fine soon."

Because he was not woken up today and just went on a mission at a normal time, Ji Changze was not very irritable, but was in a good mood and had the leisure to "comfort" the zombie.

"Don't move, eh, yes, don't move, the tooth will come out soon."

A long tooth was pulled out by pliers. Seeing that half of the zombie's face was about to be pressed into the ground by their head, the onlookers subconsciously covered their cheeks.

How could it not hurt when a tooth was forcibly pulled out? The zombie screamed so hard and whined that it completely lost the energy it had before chasing people and biting them.

"Boss, why don't I stop his mouth? Otherwise, if he keeps screaming, there are still people outside."

"It's all because of the blockage of the teeth, the growth of this thing, the deformity, and I don't even know how to go to the hospital for treatment. Isn't he tired of brushing his teeth every day with so many teeth?" Ji Changze finished complaining in disgust, and slapped the other person's head: "Stop screaming! Again! I’ll beat you to death!”

The zombie was stunned for a moment, and after reacting, he was unconvinced and howled louder than before.

Then, he was stunned by Ji Changze who struck out at the speed of light.

"Keep barking! Keep barking! You're still barking, aren't you? Just bark! I'm letting you scream!"

Ji Changze's palm strikes are always fast, especially when the opponent doesn't listen to him. People next to him can only see the afterimage of him hitting the opponent back and forth. By the time he stops, the zombie's entire head and neck have been completely beaten into the ground. .

The team members "...boss, boss, um, let's not argue with him, he has no IQ at first glance."

Ji Changze, who was twisting his wrist, looked very satisfied, "I don't care. What do I have to argue with this thing? Okay, let's dig him out and continue to extract the teeth. By the way, do we have a kitchen knife in the car? Bring it over."

Team member: "What are you doing with a kitchen knife?"

"If he doesn't call, he will cut his nails. If he calls, he will chop his tongue. Hurry up and make a quick decision. Finish it early and get off work early to eat hot pot."

The team members quickly sent one person to the car to get a kitchen knife, and the remaining people worked together to pull out the neck and head of the zombie that had been driven into the ground.

Watch Ji Changze humming a song and using pliers to pull out the opponent's teeth. He would beat him violently every time he screamed. Then he would cut his nails and change his clothes. In the end, the zombie had no energy left to scream. He lay on the chair like a dead fish and let his boss smear powder on his face. .

There were no female colleagues in their alien insurance team. Ji Changze had picked up this foundation from the electronics group next door. When he applied the powder on the zombie’s face, the female colleague felt very distressed. She carefully held it next to her and kept talking.

"You don't have to use so much. Use this powder in small amounts and many times. It has a good whitening effect. A little bit is enough. Team Ji, don't use so much force. This is a new one I bought. Enough, enough, it's white enough. Team Ji is really white.”

Finally, Ji Changze took back his hand with satisfaction. The zombie who had just regained his youthful fangs now had a pale face. Except for his eyes, which were still green, and his lips, which were extremely white, he looked normal.

He looked left and right, but it was still not perfect. He turned around and asked, "Which colleague has black and brown contact lenses? Let me borrow them."

It was the female colleague just now who raised her hand cautiously, "I have it. It's a daily disposable one, but it's just a prescription one, okay?"

"You can bring whatever you want, as long as it can cover his eyes."

So, the female colleague took out her own contact lenses and watched as Ji Changze opened the other person's eyelids with one hand and put the contact lenses on them.

After blurring his pupils, he asked his female colleague, "You should also have lipstick."

The female colleague subconsciously covered her small bag and said, "Forget about this lipstick. I feel uncomfortable when I think of using the same lipstick as this thing. The lambskin I just bought..."

The leader of the alien group, who had the face of a fifteen-year-old boy, obviously didn't understand the cause-and-effect relationship. "I don't want your sheepskin, I want to borrow your lipstick."

The female colleague said weakly: "...my lipstick is called lambskin..."

Ji Changze: "You file a report and make a price list. All the cosmetics used on this thing today will be paid at three times the price. I will approve it for you."

Female colleague "!!!"

"No problem, no problem!! Take it and use it, feel free to use it, and also, it's too monotonous like this. Team Ji, I also have eyebrow pencil, eyeliner, blush, highlighter, shadow setting powder, use these, I Guaranteed he looks more like a normal person!"

So in the end, the female colleague got her wish and used all her cosmetics on the zombie's face.

When the zombie, which had been beaten to the point of not uttering a word, was taken out, what the onlookers saw was a frighteningly white (too much powdered) middle-aged man with a sluggish look on his feet. He occasionally fell and was held up by the police. (I feel dizzy when I look at anything with prescription contact lenses).

"I heard that he took drugs and went crazy. He bit everyone he saw."

"Good guy, I made two bloody holes in my mouth. What kind of teeth are these?"

"There are actually people in China who take drugs openly and openly. I thought this kind of thing only happens abroad."

"Look at his ethereal eyes. He must not have woken up yet. These people are only living a good life. If they have to mess with these harmful things, they should be arrested."

However, the injured person who had been bitten twice was holding his arms and stretching his neck to look. He saw that the other person was indeed the face he had just seen. It was very strange. "I remember that his teeth were very long and his eyes were green."

The nurse next to him gently advised him to lie back on the stretcher, "He was like this when we came to pick you up. Sir, your memory may be confused. People who have lost too much blood and are frightened will indeed have confused memories. You can lie down first." Let’s take a rest, this is a blood transfusion.”

The injured man lay down with a puzzled look on his face. When he saw the first policeman who came to save him coming towards him, he quickly asked, "Comrade policeman, did you see that man's teeth were particularly long and his eyes were green, like a zombie?" , I remember that the nails seemed to be very long, right, you saw it too."

The police comrade (colleague in the alien protection team) looked seriously, looked at the nurse (another colleague), and began to hint, "Will the drug be transmitted to the injured person through saliva? Why did he start talking nonsense?"

——You can use this reason to tell the injured person.

The little nurse understood and immediately showed a worried look on her face, "If the other person has just taken the medicine orally and the remaining medicine remains in the mouth, it is indeed possible that it will remain in the blood of the injured person when biting, but there is no such precedent before. , so you still have to go to the hospital for a check-up to be sure.”

―Don’t worry, we will confirm that he was infected with the drug and his memory was affected.

"Then why don't you send him to the hospital?" - The matter has been resolved and the person can be sent to the hospital. Of course, it is our hospital.

"There's a big traffic jam ahead, and the ambulance can't get through." - We were afraid that a real ambulance would come and take people away, so we specially asked colleagues to create a "big traffic jam."

"Then I'll ask my colleagues to help clear a road." - Understood, I told them they could evacuate.

"It's better to send the person to the hospital for examination as soon as possible. He is already unconscious now."

The injured person said, "Huh? No, I'm not delirious. I saw that person had particularly long teeth and green eyes before."

The little nurse turned her head, pulled the quilt on the injured person, and gently comforted, "Sir, don't worry, you will be fine."

Injured person: "???Okay, thank you? If I am really not fine now...?"

Next, he lay dazed in the ambulance. On the way to the hospital, he listened to this gentle and kind-hearted little nurse, in order to "comfort" him, tell him about a poisonous mushroom that will appear after people eat it. Hallucinations, such as elves, but with good treatment, they can still return to normal.

The implication is that the green eyes and fangs in his memory are all hallucinations derived from the influence of (non-existent) drugs.

When he arrived at the hospital, the "doctor" checked him and made sure that the zombie was not poisonous and would not cause any sequelae to the injured (such as turning into a zombie or something). He then breathed a sigh of relief, maintained the doctor's benevolent smile, and gave him After the injured person explained (made up) that "there are drug residues in your body, so you saw hallucinations", the incident came to a perfect end.

For the injured, it was just an unlucky morning when they were inexplicably bitten by an intoxicated lunatic. For the crowd, it was another day to condemn drug dealers and get high. This drug is really like a zombie virus, it will bite people if infected.

However, because the police quickly reported that the drug addict had regained his consciousness and presented a letter of apology to the public to compensate the injured for various expenses, he was then sent to a drug rehabilitation center. People who eat melons quickly lost interest in this matter. .

However, a young man named Wang, who was always called Lao Wang by his classmates, had been paying close attention to this matter because the unlucky guy who was bitten was his roommate.

On this day, several people in the same dormitory bought some fruit and were on their way to the hospital, intending to visit their unlucky friend.

Just when they were joking and joking about how he could be so unlucky that someone would pop up and bite him while walking on the street, a few people suddenly noticed that standing in front of them was a middle-aged man with long hair and a dark attire. man.

This person saw them, grinned at them, and laughed.

He looked very retarded.

It’s not that this man’s smile is retarded, but the way he’s dressed, those big yellow teeth, and the cloth shoes under his feet that are stained with something messy and look disgusting, and the one on the end that looks disgusting. The long hair that has not been washed for at least more than a month makes it difficult not to think of a beggar who cannot take good care of himself because of a mental disorder.

The "beggar" stared directly at them, raised the corners of his mouth, and opened his smelly arms. "I didn't expect that there were so many mortals hidden in the depths of the sea of ​​corpses. This is really... too... alright."

Yes, this is the first demon cultivator to touch the modern world.

As for demon cultivators, except for those who have a very high status and have countless subordinates, they have to pull things from corpses, practice spells with blood, practice magic weapons with bones, and stuff souls into magic weapons. Even in the world of cultivation, corpses are also Those who are about to rot are always walking around in a sea of ​​corpses. It's strange that they can be clean.

He stared straight at the young students across from him. His attention was not on their cleanliness, but on the fact that they, like the pedestrians around them, had no spiritual power.

So much "material"...

He doesn't have spiritual power yet, so it's not like he can just do whatever he wants.

However, there is no need to do it himself. If these mortals know his identity as a demon cultivator, they will immediately kneel down and beg for mercy. Then, he can completely force these mortals to do things.

Thinking about it, he smiled contentedly with big yellow teeth.

Several students opposite "..."

"He seems to be a little abnormal."

"Is he lost? Maybe his family is looking for him. He looks so pitiful."

"How about we call the police?"

While they were discussing, the demon cultivator finally thought clearly. He raised his chin condescendingly and looked at these humble mortals: "Mortals, I am the cave master of the 42nd cave in Huangling Mountain. Now I want to accept you as my subordinates and as my cave master." If you agree to do something, this cave master will naturally not treat you badly. If you don’t agree, you will become the cave master’s soul today.”

students"???"

"It sounds familiar."

"A fairy tale?"

"No, it sounds very familiar."

The student who said it was familiar to him finally recalled what sounded familiar to him. His eyes lit up and he stepped forward in two or three steps. He came up with a stream of rainbow farts and sweet words, "It is an honor for us to have the Cave Master as my subordinate. Cave Master, you are the best." No matter what you say, we promise to do whatever you want.”

other people"???"

Can madness be contagious? ?

The students who were blowing rainbow farts turned around and winked at them and mouthed 50,000 yuan!

The whole dormitory had been laughing together for several days about the news that the mental hospital had offered a reward of 50,000 yuan to find someone.

The others were stunned for a moment before reacting.

fifty thousand! ! !

The unscrupulous poor college students immediately put on flattering smiles on their faces.

"Yes, yes, it is our blessing to be able to work for the cave master."

"Master of the Cave, if you have anything to do, just ask. Are you thirsty or hungry? Can I buy you a bottle of water?"

"Come on, cave master, let's go this way, the sun will be shining on you over there."

The demon cultivator felt comfortable and happy after being flattered, and felt proud in his heart.

Sure enough, mortals have light bones. When they see him, they want to hold him in the sky.

Well, since these people are so smart, let’s kill them later.

Behind him, a student took out his mobile phone and started sending messages openly.

Half an hour later, Mo Xiu was coaxed by them to say that he was looking for a beautiful girl. In fact, he walked to the designated location on the official blog of the mental hospital - a large iron box.

When the door of the box was closed and the students who had been flattering him just now were laughing and joking, the demon cultivator realized that he had been sold.

He was really caught off guard. After all, in his impression, mortals were weak, just like ants. Who would be prepared for an ant?

As a result, he was really sold by Ant.

He didn't know what this weird instrument was made of, and no matter how much magic he used, he couldn't break it.

There was a short boy next to him who had a vicious attitude and asked him to be honest.

He was filled with hatred in his heart, "I am a demon cultivator!! If you dare to treat me like this, I will lead my brothers to crush you mortals!!"

Ji Changze: "Hey, Demon Cultivator."

He turned to a team member and said, "This rhetoric is fresh enough today."

Demon cultivator "??"

This look of disbelief is what kind of trouble is going on.

He pointed in the direction of the students, "If you don't believe it! Just ask these mortals!!"

Student 1: "Hahahahaha, brother, take good care of yourself."

Student 2 “You must take medicine regularly.”

Student 3: "Hahahahahaha, watch less TV series. Returning Demonic Cultivator, it's so funny. Is there really such an uncle as you in this world who can return Demonic Cultivator to Reincarnation?"

Demon cultivator "..."

Why do you mortals change your attitude so quickly? Didn’t you still believe that I was a demon cultivator before? !

"I am a demon cultivator!! I really am a demon cultivator!! Listen!! If I can come here today, other demon cultivators can come too!! This world of yours, which is full of mortals, will become ours sooner or later. "

An aunt passed by with a vegetable basket and glanced at her, "Hey, mental illness is really difficult to deal with now."

The students laughed and laughed, "He's pretty good at making stuff up."

"No, why didn't he say he could fly?"

Demon Cultivator: "This cave master can fly!! It's just restricted by this cage!!"

A man in a white coat came over and nodded perfunctorily, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you are a demon cultivator, you can fly, you are so awesome."

Demon cultivator "..."

He couldn't tell that it was just perfunctory.

A student kindly stepped forward to comfort him: "Uncle, don't be afraid. Take good treatment. As long as you take the medicine well, you will definitely become a normal person. And uncle, although you may not believe it, really, what is cultivation?" Ah, Mo Xiu, those are all fake, stop watching novels and TV series, come on!"

"I am a demon cultivator!! I am really a demon cultivator in the world of cultivation!!!"

"You mortals!! Ignorant mortals!! You actually think that demonic cultivators do not exist. You have never seen the vastness of the world of cultivation! You don't know how powerful cultivators are!"

However, no matter how true his feelings were, he was just helpless and furious. Even though many people passed by here, and some took photos and videos, but there was a car parked here with the name Mental Hospital on it, and no one believed him.

"It's so pathetic, so crazy."

"People nowadays tend to go crazy easily if they are under too much pressure."

"Not long ago, there was a mentally ill person who thought he was a bird. This one is even worse. He actually thought he was a demon cultivator from the world of cultivation and could fly. Why not write a novel if he is so imaginative?"

Demon cultivator: "..."

"Everything I said is true!!! It's true!!!"