How-not to be an Olympian God!

Chapter 7: Aphrodite, Goddess of moral ambiguity(TW: Mentions of PTSD)

"Some of us nymphs used to dabble in cuisine and they used to make much better tasting foods than this..." Contrary to her usual tone, Crista spoke in a bittersweet, even nostalgic tone. He wanted to ask her more about it but before he could do so, he heard a knock coming from the entrance.

Alex went to check it out while Crista stayed in the kitchen, still deep in thought. When he finally reached the entrance, the knocks got louder and more frequent, it looks like the person knocking was quite impatient.

'Can't they just wait?' Alex thought in his head. He hated impatient people, and he was going to proceed as slowly as possible just to teach them a lesson. Petty.

When he opened the door, Alex was rather surprised by what he saw. It was a woman. She was wearing a light magenta gauze that draped over her body yet it didn't hide her curves and back-problem-causing breasts. She had platinum blonde hair that reached her shoulders and skin whiter than ivory, her eyes were of a vibrant magenta colour, also emitting that same depth and glow Alex had seen in the other gods he's met. Alex didn't dare look at her appearance too much because he felt like he would be trapped in those eyes forever and he didn't like the feeling of being manipulated.

The devil in question seemed rather displeased that he didn't look at her appearance more and her towering height made her seem a bit intimidating.

'Who is this?' He wondered internally.

"Hello" said Alex.

When he greeted her, it was as if her contempt and anger from earlier disappeared instantly. It felt unnatural. She responded with a 'vibrant' smile and slanted eyes "Isn't it rude to leave a beautiful lady waiting?"

It seemed the 'beautiful lady' was herself in question. Alex thought that she is in fact beautiful, but saying it comes off as a bit distasteful. Alex didn't really know how to respond so they just stood in awkward silence for a short while before it was interrupted by her words.

"Anyways. I'm Aphrodite, goddess of love, beauty and fertility. I'm here to ask you something, can I come in?" 'Aphrodite' said in a cutesy annoying voice. When she asked him to come in she leaned really close to him, and he got a whiff of a strange perfume that overwhelmed his senses. Alex leaned back, frowning a bit and inviting her inside.

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He remembered there was a table and chairs in the balcony, acceptable for hosting guests, so he led her there and they sat down, opposite of each other, and surrounded by the mountains of Olympus.

"Beautiful scenery, isn't it?" said Aphrodite. However her expression of displeasure clearly wasn't one of someone appreciating beautiful scenery. At this moment Alex would usually offer tea or other drink and food to his guest but he didn't like her that much so he just omitted it.

"Anyways, how are you liking my gift?" asked Aphrodite with a smile on her face that completely replaced her earlier frown.

'Gift.....? She must be referring to Crista. Well, she's not very useful but I guess I should thank her..?' Alex thought in his mind.

"Ah. Yes. I'm grateful, Lady Aphrodite." responded Alex in a formal tone.

She seemed to be frustrated at his sudden use of honorifics, and she subtly pulled her chair closer to his.

"If she is disobedient, just tell me and I'll send her for a round of torture. Also, drop the formal tone. I'm a youthful maiden and it doesn't fit to use such honorifics" Aphrodite said in a calm tone. Alex was a bit shocked at her casual mention of torture and her disregard for Crista, but he then remembered that this was Olympus and cruelty and injustice were fundamental elements of the god's personalities.

'I mean, Crista doesn't really do her duties and she's a bit annoying...but at least she speaks her mind, unlike Aphrodite, who makes me feel like I'm conversing with a slithering snake'

"She's attending to her duties seriously. Thank you for the offer though" Alex responded calmly.

Aphrodite then clapped her hands and took out 2 objects from thin air, a small wooden box and a letter. She then spoke.

"Anyways, let's talk about why I'm here in the first place. I'd like you to do a favour for me." She continued "Of course, as a reward, you can ask for anything" Aphrodite emphasized on the 'anything' part like she was expecting something. Alex clicked his tongue, in his mind of course.

"What do I have to do?" Alex asked in a confident tone.

"The king of the city of Abdera has recently married and wishes for my blessings for a happy marriage and numerous offspring. I accepted because the city has been a big source of faith for me but I can't go personally. That's where you come in. You would deliver the blessing and this letter for legitimacy to the king" Aphrodite finished her sentence but he heard her mumbling "*Tsk* These kinds of requests are more fit for that bitch Hera but she's always busy chasing around that unfaithful husband of hers" It looked like Aphrodite and Hera don't get along too much.

Alex fell into thought. There wasn't much to lose from doing it and he could request for Essence and in addition to that making an enemy out of Aphrodite didn't seem like a good idea and he would get a chance to explore this world.

"I see, is Abdera far though? How will I get there?" Alex asked curiously. He hasn't heard too much of this world's transportation methods, but they're probably still using horses and carriages.

"When you climb down Olympus, you'll find the city of Olep. Show the consul my seal on this letter and he'll give you the best of carriages and horses" Bingo. It seemed that Alex's hypothesis was right.

"Now that I've told you I should get going. If you need anything, I'm in the 4th peak east of here~~" Aphrodite stated with a flirtatious tone that made Alex feel sick.

'Should I send her off?' Alex ultimately decided to send her off because offending her wouldn't do him any good considering how weak he is. He remembered what Hermes told him about his role in Olympus, that, with him having no specialties whatsoever, he'll probably be running errands for the major gods for a while before he finds his place in the pantheon.

Feeling a bit sad about his current powerlessness, he made his way back to the kitchen only to see Crista sprawled on the floor, loudly gasping for breath and shaking like a cold kitten. Alex ran to check up on her and she turned her head to face him.

"That was A-Aphrodite who came by just now????" She looked at him with fear on her face.

"Yes. It was. What's wrong?" Alex gave her his hand and she reluctantly took it and stood up. She looked at him in the eyes and asked "Do you remember what I told you earlier about nymphs?"

He somewhat remembered her speaking about nymphs when they were eating, only to be interrupted by Aphrodite's arrival, so he nodded.

"She.....Aphrodite imprisoned and.....killed most of the nymphs because she was jealous of their beauty. Aphrodite doesn't want anyone other than her to be beautiful, she's sick to the core. I was f***ing young back then but I remember it very clearly. The screams of my brethren...They still haunt me in my nightmares. I was only spared because Aphrodite didn't consider darker skin to be beautiful, so she let me go" Crista recounted what happened while Alex looked at her with an incredulous expression. Although he guesses that Aphrodite probably wasn't exactly the archetype of a good person, but genocide....and mass imprisonment, those are on a different level than just being a bad person.

"How old were you back then?" Alex asked with a very quiet voice, trying to make sense of what he was just told.

"I was 12.....now I'm 60 and I still remember everything" Alex didn't have the time to get impressed by Crista's current age as he thought about his own life. When he was 12, he lived with his mother and his younger brother had yet to be born so they lived alone but they led a very happy life. His mom did everything in her effort to make sure Alex grew up in a safe and happy environment and he thanks his mom for making him who he is today and braving with a smile even through hard times. Alex thought about Crista, the fact that at the age of 12, she saw her entire family get slaughtered or incarcerated and that she had to live with that trauma. Alex's family was very very far now, but at the very least, they were alive and healthy but Crista's family...

For the next hour, Crista would weep and unlike the past, where she was left to cry alone, she now had Alex, who came from the modern world where an understanding of mental health was achieved, comforting her and making a note to himself to never mention nymphs to hear to avoid triggering her PTSD.

They then both went to their respective rooms and while Alex was packing some clothes, he heard footsteps ring out in his room, it was Crista and it looked like she was doing better now.

"Thank you" She said silently. Alex nodded. When she saw him packing his luggage and ready to leave, she asked "Before you go, how the f**k do you make that toppings on flatbread thing?"

"Pizza. It's called pizza" Alex corrected her and since he was going to pack some food for his trip anyways, he went down to the kitchen with her and showed her how to make, although with her dexterity that was miles better than his, Alex was sure she would do the pizza full justice.

He then said his goodbyes to her and left the estate, finding himself in the plaza, beyond which was a convenient staircase leading down the mountains. It looked infinitely long but that was better than the alternative of hiking down the jagged mountains and the slippery snow and ice.

What seemed like an eternity later...

"Ughh...Finally" Alex groaned. In front of him was a square with many staircases that seemed to connect all of the inhabited peaks of Olympus. This was just the easier half of the journey however. There was no clear way to go down now and he would definitely have to traverse the rough landscape.

"It's Demeter's work, all this snow. I suppose you're frustrated by it too" A voice rang out behind Alex, he turned around. It was a man wearing a cloak that was hiding his face and holding a big flask in his hand, and considering the strong stench of alcohol coming from him, it was probably wine. And although most of the man's face was hidden, Alex could see that his face was very red, showing that the man was drunk.

His words were interesting too. Demeter....From what Alex remembers, she's the goddess of life and farming and the mother of Persephone, Queen of the Underworld.

"How so?" Asked Alex. He was genuinely curious and wanted to learn more about the various gods.

"When her daughter goes every winter to the Underworld, anywhere she goes to she turns the perimeter into a snowy landscape in frigid rage. She's currently in Olympus so we're stuck with this bad weather, not good for parties. She's very strong too so even Zeus can't order her around" Although the man spoke in long syllables, indicating he was drunk, his words were understandable and coherent.

"It does make it hard to go down the mountain...." Alex sighed.

"Maybe our encounter was fated, young man, what is your name?" Asked the drunk man with a mysterious tone.

"Alex. What's yours, sir?"

"Don't mind my name too much. They just call me the King of parties" the man answered funnily and continued speaking "I know a fast and smooth way down the mountain, that is, if you don't mind the occasional tree or two"

Alex decided to follow the man's lead, even though he didn't really understand the part about trees and whatnot.

Thus the two man hiked before making it to a steep side of the mountains, and the man turned around and told Alex "That's Olep there, you can see it from here"

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Alex turned at the direction the man was looking, and in fact, he could see a sprawling and beautiful city from here, with an acropolis, lakes and rivers and beautiful buildings.

"It's very beautiful. But.....How are we going to get down?" Alex asked because the only thing in front of them was a steep fall and it looked dangerous. Alex turned around the man's answer but then he saw the man jumping and riding on the snow while hinting for him to do the same.

Alex thought the man had gone crazy from too much alcohol, but, on second glance, the slide looked smooth and fun.....

"You know what....I'm immortal...You only have infinite lives...I want to do it....I can do it!!" Alex kept mumbling to himself, hesitating whether to jump or not.

Well, he ended up jumping.

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