I Don't Want This Bad Ending

"Are you ready to know the truth?" asked Cassandra.

She looks at me with those worried eyes. I'd say that we became close in the span of almost three years. It was really a tough road!

How I did all the tasks she wished for me to be able to persuade her to make me potions and cure my curse if possible.

"I am… It's what I wanted since I lost my memories." I smiled to assure her. 

"Are you sure? Adelyn?" said Gil.

"Yes, Gil. It's what I need to know, right? You of all people know that I need to know the truth."

"Alright…"

I drank the black liquid that was inside the vile bottle. 

"Ugh… bitter!"

Cassandra took the vial and beckoned me to rest on my room.

"Go to your room. I'll check on you later if the potion works and I can make you remember what you want to know."

"Okay...I'll take a nap then, wake me up before dinner."

Gil nod and Cassandra shooed me using her hands.

I grinned before I left the two in the living area and ran to the stairs. Walking to the farthest room in the right, I opened the door, and a small creaking sound was heard. 

The smell of herbs that I procured in the forest and grinding it to help in making my potions and the familiar room with a small window located at the right side of my bed was the first to be seen when I opened the door. For the past two years, this was my home.

"Finally,… after a long wait."

It took me a while but I'm almost there. Who would have thought that my mana leakage would need to be in constant medication and would take me two years before it could be cured permanently. 

That damn evil! How dare he do this to me!

*sigh*

Laying down on my not so soft bed and looking at the ceiling that was made of wood and a little bit of dust. I looked back at what happened.

Four years of running away, hiding and letting the novel take its course was what I've done.

I was afraid of the impending ending that will befall to me. 

In my situation, even if I stay still and don't do anything, I will still be labeled as the evil witch and condemned to die at the guillotine.

Why am I so sure about that? No, I'm not actually sure that what I see was my reality but dreaming of it almost every day made me believe that it was my end.

The dream I had several times was so vivid and too realistic that it sends shivers down my spine. For a month, before the hunting event, EVERYDAY. 

I saw myself beheaded under the rusty guillotine. The smell of my blood, the dead sunset eyes that I see, the smile of the people who framed me, the accusations of the townspeople that I don't know.

It was too realistic to let it pass by and think that it was all a dream. That's why I planned to abandon everything and live peacefully.

The dream of me dying was replayed and only stopped when I finally escaped the Kingdom of Levingstone.

I say that I didn't regret the decision that I made to save myself. And I can't afford to save the others if my fate was sealed because of the novel.

Though I knew the ending of the story, everyone I knew was living happily without me, if I based it in the novel.

And besides, changing the plot of the story was actually harder than you can imagine. Thinking about those villainess novels that became the protagonist… really what a feat.

Changing the course of fate was something that was harder than I thought.

Until the day I planned my escape, I was still not thinking of this world as my real world. That was my mistake. As I only see this as a story in a novel that will lead to a happy ending by the author that wrote this story and I, who was a villainess, had a doomed ending.

I thought that everything that I've done didn't affect the story. I mean, I'll die, and everyone would have the happy ending that they want. But I guess because I was still alive, I obtained the news about them.

In the manor, the Emsworth mansion, I made a contact with Sheila, my maid.

I was thankful for my maid, who was in the first place reacted like I miraculously revived from the death because I only contacted her after a year. 

It was hard to make her believe that I wasn't dead and just "recuperating".

She was the one who kept me updated to what was happening in the Kingdom of Levingstone.

First, Duke Keene, my father. Sheila said that after what happened to me, he was still looking for the culprit who caused the fire. And he became colder and stern as he was before.

He stormed the Royal Palace and told the King that he will cancel the engagement even though they think that it was natural as "I" was presumed dead.

She also wrote that my stupid brother became cold and distant than ever. The whole place was quieter than ever, and the Duke became brutal and my brother was always dazed.

I can't believe it though. Who would have thought that my existence will affect them that much?

Sheila also wrote that the Crown Prince Edickart had engaged to Lady Elise.

As expected, it was like in the story. She also became the saintess because of her Light magic.

Right now, they were called the power couple. "Pftt!"

Thinking about it made me laugh.

While Adley was the losing faction, I knew that he's cooking something. Until Edickart wasn't crowned the King, I know that he will do something to get that position of becoming the King.

What I didn't expect is that Gab left the mansion and my father actually let him go. And besides that, I don't know where he's gone to.

Maybe in his place in the Kingdom of Bahalkii? Who knows… I just wished that he has the freedom that he always yearned for.

As for Cabel? He was diligently looking for me for the first two years.

There were a few times that I was almost discovered when I went into town to exchange some herbs. And there were a few shadow knights that were disguised as peddlers.

I would like to show myself to him, but it's not the time. I was still weak and don't know who I should trust.

"I'm really selfish…"

I abandoned everyone because I was afraid of them betraying me.

A few moments passed and my deep thoughts plunged into the darkness and my heavy eyelids were unconsciously closing and I submerged to the abyss and I slept while thinking about the future that awaits.

***

"Are you ready?"

Cassandra asked, it was in the middle of the night where the moon was shining brightly. Gil was also standing with his sharp gaze and his seriousness that hides his worries.

"Gil, don't worry. I will just take my memories back."

We were at the front lawn, the spell that Cassandra will evoke needs the light of the moon, and the powder of different types of animals remains with her blood and my blood mixed together and scattered in a shape of a circle to form the enchantment.

I don't know why she needs my blood, but she said it was because I was the one affected by the magic.

So, even though it hurts, I slashed my wrist and gave a bowl of my blood.

Cassandra's magic is stronger during the night as she possesses the dark magic that has the affinity to darkness that can be obtained during the night.

The unreadable letters that she said were the spell from the ancient dark magic and me at the center of the magic circle as the target of the spell.

"This will hurt, Evelyn…" Cassandra warned.

I was shocked that I turned my head to where Cassandra was. 

"What? Do you think I don't know that you're using an alias while "that" brother was not a human, but your contracted spirit?"

I never told anyone that my real name was Evelyn and Gil was my contracted spirit. And there was never a time that Gil slipped his tongue in front of Cassandra and call me with my real name.

"Huh? If you know you should've said it!"

She chuckled.

"I was waiting you know… but I figured that I should be the one to bring it up if you're going to remember your memories now." She explained.

"HuH? What's that supposed to mean?"

"We will talk about this later, for now focus on the enchantment! This will hurt!" she continued.

"Tell me how much I should expect…"

"The enchantment circle that I cast is a taboo, so it will hurt. You will feel like your head was splitting in half… or someone smashing your head…"

I gulped my dry saliva because of nervousness.

"Do you have anesthesia? Ha ha …or better knock me down so, I can't feel it?" I said, while my eyes were pleading.

'I don't like experiencing pain, especially after I got stabbed in my first life.'

But Cassandra just dismissed my plea and continued to talk.

"… anyway because your memories were cast with a dark magic and sealed with different locks this will take time. So, once the full moon's light hit the spell, then be ready…"

I looked at her, anticipating what she would say.

"It will hurt like hell…" she continued.

"F*ck!"