Since The Red Moon Appeared

Is this feeling painful?

Lu Xin couldn't explain it himself, he didn't even know why he was crying, but the tears kept flowing.

Probably because I saw myself clearly for the first time?

...

...

Growing up to this age, Lu Xin's life has always been muddled.

Even his memories are always grey. On and off, he didn't even want to think about it carefully. Because, every time he tried to start recalling those things, it was something very depressing.

However, a report card from the old dean suddenly made his life in several stages very clear.

He didn't try to discuss it with his family, but that transcript, and a few trials on the transcript.

Because he is very clear.

Seeing the trial of life, he remembered the initial stages of his vague memories.

I recalled that I seemed to wake up from an abstract nightmare, ignorant and ignorant of everything in this world.

He remembered the nightmare clearly, but he couldn't describe the scene in the dream to others.

Because everything in that dream is abstract and cannot be explained in human language.

All the perceptions in the dream are clearly telling myself that the world has no meaning.

If it is a trial, it is the first and most inexplicable trial, but in the end, it has its own meaning.

The advent of oneself and the perception of this world is a trial.

...

...

But after that trial, he was still in a daze.

Just curiously looking at the people around me and everything around me, I think it's all fresh and interesting, but it doesn't matter.

Until now, Lu Xin recalled the time when he was in the orphanage. He still remembered that he looked at all the scenes and appearances around him with an unusually calm gaze, but he did not understand why others would cry and laugh. Abundant emotions.

At that time, it was like being trapped in a thick shell.

Seeing other people's pain and anger, he felt that it didn't matter, he didn't understand, he just felt hypocritical.

Teacher Xiaolu is actually a very stupid girl.

She regards herself as a friend without knowing herself at all, and stubbornly believes that she is kind.

In fact, from now on, the person who understands him the most is No. 7.

Maybe it's because she's also the type closest to a monster?

All perception begins on that rainy night.

The betrayal and blood, gunfire and fire, the death of life and the shattering of hope that night awakened him.

The thick shell was finally broken, and I felt the pain.

It was the first time I clearly felt the pain.

Afterwards...

Lu Xin still remembers that his memory was in chaos. For at least two or three years, he didn't know how he got here. He just calculated from the time. At that time, he should have been wandering on the street for a long time. After taking him in, he began to live a normal and healthy life and study, until one night, when he came home from overtime, he met Mr. Xiaolu.

Her leg is broken.

Start working hard, earn money, take care of them, help them.

It was also during that time that my memories of the orphanage began to take on color.

When I experienced those things in the orphanage, I just felt indifferent, but from that moment on, when I recalled these things, it became more and more interesting, and sometimes I even smiled involuntarily at the corner of my mouth.

This is also considered, lost, only began to know its good?

Very tired, but it seems that the most fulfilling years are those years.

Lu Xin thought that if he continued like this, he would actually be very satisfied.

But, life will go on after all.

Joined the Special Qing Department, saw spiritual monsters, learned about spiritual pollution, and learned about the so-called capable people.

I found that my family members were very capable people who could help me a lot.

However, they seem to have their own secrets too. They are deliberately hiding it from themselves, but they are also subconsciously and cautiously. Cooperating with them to hide some secrets, it seems that they are playing a silent kind of tacit understanding. game.

Games are boring.

More than once, I have felt a fire burning in my heart, and I have questioned the world.

I often feel that some things are ridiculous, absurd, and childish.

However, it seems that everyone else is like this, and I am not a person who likes to be in the limelight, so...

Only at certain special moments, the fire burns all of a sudden.

Unreasonable anger and impulsive indifference often appear in my mind irregularly.

Whenever this fire burns, I will understand something and understand something.

It's like a person on a 100-meter track who finds that he can accelerate endlessly, all the time.

When accelerating, there is a sense of freedom, very comfortable.

But when accelerating, it will hurt others...

... Lu Xin has always understood that there is never any divinity, only himself.

...

...

The self that Teacher Xiaolu was looking forward to did not exist at all.

She misunderstood herself at a very young age and took that as her real self.

Whether it's indifference or impulsiveness, whether it's showing a smile that others should have, or subconsciously feeling indifference, Lu Xin doesn't know what he looks like in the eyes of others, but in his own feelings, he is himself...

Everything is just one's own feeling.

Sometimes, he especially hopes that someone can understand him, but he can't explain it clearly.

Others cannot understand their state.

If someone really understands him, maybe it's the old dean...

This transcript says it all.

But, why must it be yourself?

Lu Xin didn't know what the old dean was doing, but he really didn't like it!

It seems that the things that make me feel interesting and happy all happened in the past.

Things in the future are not worth looking forward to at all.

Lu Xin lightly beat his head, only to feel a deep gloom and a sense of despair.

Why can't I live like the people I envy in the first place?

why?

Tears were still streaming down his face, but Lu Xin's eyes were already red...

Anger erupted from the bottom of his eyes again, and everything in the room was shaking non-stop.

At this moment, he could feel the twisting of the muscles on his face.

The piece of paper, under his gaze, quickly became twisted and full of folds.

"Do you really think you can completely control my life?"

...

...

Also at this time, northwest of Black Marsh City, a hundred miles away, next to the dark swamp.

The huge red moon has sunk to the west and is about to disappear.

The rays of the red moon cut out seven or eight figures riding on motorcycles beside the black swamp so clearly.

It was a group of people wearing armed uniforms, with supplies on the back seat of the car, and gun bags in front of the car. Looking at their clothes, they were all dressed in standard knighthood. They were separated by two or three meters. A woman sitting on a motorcycle is caught in the middle.

The woman looks like a twenty-six or seven-year-old woman, still very young.

She was born with a soul-stirring beauty, but there were several hideous scars on her face.

Her legs are slender, leaning on the motorcycle, her lines are strong and beautiful, and all the exposed skin on her body is tattooed with large and strange tattoos. With a strange sense of terror.

She was wearing a wild navel-baring outfit, but her flat and delicate abdomen had an ugly scar.

The scar formed a circle around her waist, and the tattoo could not cover it, as if she had been torn off by someone.

She lowered her head slightly, breathing low and slow.

After an unknown amount of time, he suddenly raised his head, took a deep breath, and threw his right arm violently.

"Miss is back?"

Hearing her suddenly gasping for breath, the people next to her suddenly became complacent and looked over with some concern.

Some of these people looked like they were in their thirties or forties, but they called her "eldest sister" naturally. One of them had a beard and looked very mature. He immediately stepped forward and whispered to her: " The things in the ghost fire swamp have been obtained, and we seem to have aroused the alertness of the minus zero troops, and now they are in the north, quickly approaching us."

"Negative zero troops?"

"Eldest sister" frowned and said with a sneer, "Looking for death."

Many of the people next to him laughed out loud, pulled out the long spear from the gun bag, carried it on his shoulder, and said, "Fuck them?"

The eldest sister wanted to agree, but she hesitated for a while, looked in the direction of Black Marsh City, and shook her head.

"Forget it this time, withdraw."

The others looked at her curiously.

"If you encounter the negative zero troops now, at least half of you will die."

The eldest sister said coldly: "I'm in a bad mood today, and I'm too lazy to pick someone to fill your vacancies."

The sturdy men and girls around suddenly let out knowing laughter.

When the motorcycle started, they were like ghosts, swiftly following the path beside the swamp, and hurriedly drove towards the south. The bright lights of the motorcycle rushed into the darkness, forming seven or eight intertwined lines, which were enough to match the swamp. The bright white light of the red moon.

The eldest sister rushed to the front of the bike, the engine hummed, and scared away countless small beasts or other things.

Her brows seemed to be frowning tightly, as if she was thinking about something.

After driving a few hundred meters, she suddenly wanted to understand, and her expression suddenly became clear, and it turned into anger.

"Old man, are you taking advantage of me?"

She cursed in a low voice: "Why, are you always so partial to him?"

No one answered, even the knights who were rushing forward around her were accustomed to her sudden emotional out-of-control and unprovoked cursing, and turned a blind eye to it. But she cursed herself more and more fiercely, as if all the dissatisfaction in her heart poured out at once: "It's obviously only me who should be the most concerned about and the one who should invest the most, but you only value that monster..."

"Could it be that only those who are disobedient can make you pay more attention, then I have no problem at all..."

"I can be more rebellious than him..."

"..."

"..."

The more she talked, the more insane she was, and she even beat her head with her hands angrily.

Because the trouble this time was too fierce, even the knight next to him felt worried and looked at her.

"I'm fine..."

The woman looked up at them, her eyes were blood red, but her face was full of tears, and she explained fiercely: "I was bitten by a weird dog, it seems to affect my mood, I am now , obviously wanted to laugh out loud..."

As she spoke, she pointed to her face: "But I'm crying..."

The surrounding knights turned their heads, and what she said seemed reasonable.

But before, she wouldn't explain this.

After the woman explained, she suddenly twisted the accelerator and rushed forward fiercely, as if she wanted to use the wind to dry her tears.

"Damn, nasty, so nasty..."

She gritted her teeth and roared in a low voice, "You're just bullying me, right?"

"I have a brain, but I just don't like to use it..."

"I already have the ability, why should I use my brain to deal with these things?"

"..."

The more she talked, the more she hated. At the end, she had a cold smile on her face: "Old man, you will definitely fail."

"You often say that divinity can be calculated."

"However, what he has now is not only divinity, but humanity, how do you calculate it?"

Ask for... a ticket?