Since The Red Moon Appeared

Seeing Teacher Xiaolu who woke up at some point with annoyed expression, Lu Xin and No. 8 all suddenly fell silent.

They saw Teacher Xiaolu's guilt and inner torture.

But they stand at two different angles, neither understand nor understand.

The children in the orphanage are divided into three types:

One is those who died and were brought back to life, such as No. 8. They all maintain different attitudes and feelings towards Lu Xin who killed them back then. The other is people who have died. They are unconscious, but there are still people who love them.

There is another kind, the little deer...

She survived, but she became disabled. People who used to run so fast can no longer run.

It stands to reason that she is the most painful one...

That's why Eight found her, because she was the most suitable person for the lawsuit.

However, now she thinks that she is the sinner.

And, is this emotion true?

...

...

"I……"

Teacher Xiaolu also opened his mouth with difficulty, summoned up his courage, and looked at Lu Xin.

It seemed difficult for her to look directly into Lu Xin's eyes.

Moreover, in her eyes, Lu Xin only saw a little fear, more guilt and sadness.

"I've always known..."

She whispered, but didn't say what she knew.

As if trying to sort out his chaotic thoughts, he slowly raised his head to look at No. 8, and said, "You are right to seek justice for the children in the orphanage. They really shouldn't just be forgotten like this. But, you shouldn't be looking for Lu Xin..."

"Really, because the escape plan at that time was originally proposed by me..."

She answered with some difficulty: "If it wasn't for me, how could the escape fail, and how could something like this happen?"

"..."

Listening to her words, Lu Xin and Number Eight fell into deep silence.

They were not surprised by this answer.

They naturally knew who proposed the escape plan back then, because they were all involved in it.

However, in the face of Teacher Xiaolu's deep self-blame, even No. 8 couldn't show his approval. When Teacher Xiaolu said these words, he couldn't help shaking his head, although he didn't think of how to refute these things for a while. words, but he didn't agree with them at all.

If the escape plan fails, is the person who proposed the escape plan guilty?

Of course this is not right.

No matter who it is, no one can question such a person...

...

...

"No, there are many things you don't know..."

But when both Lu Xin and No. 8 showed subconscious denial attitudes, Mr. Xiaolu shook his head vigorously, stopped the two people from speaking, and said in a low voice: "It's not as simple as you think. I'm in charge……"

"At that time, I was just a person who was stealing and eating in the chaotic city..."

"I never knew when I was going to starve to death."

"That, that orphanage that is like a nightmare to you, is like a paradise to me."

"Only when I'm there can I have a full meal, and I can even eat chocolates that are so sweet that I couldn't imagine before. I can even sit in the classroom, read, write, Put on clean clothes..."

"..."

During Teacher Xiaolu's narration, both Lu Xin and No. 8 remained silent.

Her words seemed to bring the memories of that time to her, making people involuntarily immersed in it.

"Tell me, what dissatisfaction did I have with such a good life at that time..."

Teacher Xiaolu spoke slowly, his voice trembling slightly: "I don't know why I said that at the beginning, I... I am with you, and I know that this is the best life, but I always I deliberately told you about the life outside, as if I was showing off, telling you how big the outside world is, how free it is..."

Having said that, she couldn't help but lower her voice slightly.

After a long time, she opened her mouth in a low voice: "I didn't know at the time what my pointless showing off meant in the eyes of those children who were clean on the surface but were subjected to various experiments almost every day behind their backs. what a longing..."

"Later, an escape plan emerged..."

"I am the one who accurately proposed this escape plan."

As she spoke, she couldn't help shaking her head subconsciously: "But in fact, the one who really wants to escape is not me."

"I didn't need to conduct experiments, so why would I want to escape?"

"Long before I even brought it up, or rather, long before I started doing those pointless shows with lies, there were a lot of older kids in the orphanage who thought, I just found out what they thought, and for the first time It's just a suggestion..."

"I even felt like a little hero for taking you out because I saw the needle holes and knife wounds on your bodies."

"..."

Listening to her narration, Lu Xin and No. 8 also showed confusion on their faces.

Even they have all but forgotten what happened before the escape plan was actually realized.

At that time, everything seemed to be natural and logical.

Too many children feel the pain from the torture of endless experiments.

And they grew up day by day, and gradually realized their strength.

Although because of their young age, they haven't yet had the idea of ​​really resisting those adults.

But the idea of ​​running away became more and more clear in his mind.

They want to leave this orphanage and escape this eternal torture and experiment.

All this happened, as if it was destined.

Who would remember exactly how this idea was born at that time, and how it was determined...

Teacher Xiaolu actually remembers...

She actually remembered it so clearly, as if she hadn't forgotten anything.

Perhaps, because of the children's subtle competitiveness, she used lies to describe the beauty of the outside world to them. Perhaps, she did feel like a hero, because she could save these suffering children and escape from this sea of ​​suffering...

But can these be identified as mistakes?

...

...

"Later, the escape plan was determined among a group of children."

Teacher Xiaolu seemed to be panting for a long time before slowly speaking again: "But the ones who wanted to run away in the first place were not so many people at all, it was the older children who decided to run away, and they didn't want to take those few people with them. Children who are still young. Because they are young and immature, it is almost impossible to escape from the heavily guarded orphanage with them..."

"but……"

Her voice trembled, and she continued with difficulty: "But I stopped them."

"I am very brave, I am really brave, I really think that at that time, I was the smartest among you..."

"I want them to take everyone and run away, so they can look like heroes."

"Except for these children, I even, I even insisted that Lu Xin... take number nine with him."

"..."

This was the first time she called Lu Xin "Number Nine".

And when she said these two words, she raised her head slightly, with indescribable self-blame and fear in her eyes.

"Those older children actually don't intend to take you with them, because they are all afraid of you..."

Teacher Xiaolu explained to Lu Xin with some difficulty: "In the eyes of many people, you are more fearful than the orphanage..."

Lu Xin listened to these words in silence, then nodded slightly.

Naturally, he also remembered what happened in the orphanage at that time. The more sensible and older people are, the more afraid they are of themselves.

So, instead, ordinary people like Mr. Xiaolu and children like Sanxiaozhi get close to him.

And I... I don't seem to be close to anyone.

In the world at that time, in my eyes, there was only curiosity and estrangement.

"But I insisted that they take you."

Teacher Xiaolu spoke slowly, eyes full of guilt.

"But not because of something noble, really..."

She seemed to muster up the most courage before she said these words: "I must take you with me at that time because I know that those older children are afraid of you, and I have a good relationship with you, so I took you with me, Those older kids will listen to me, I..."

"I even asked in front of them if you would really take us away and if you would listen to me..."

"I don't know how happy I was when you smiled and agreed, but the older children didn't dare to answer..."

"They finally didn't dare to abandon us, they didn't even dare to say that they wanted to give up the escape plan..."

"..."

Number eight's eyes gradually became confused.

Teacher Xiaolu's words seemed to be just talking about something they already knew.

However, what she said now, as the person involved, he actually felt more and more confused the more he listened...

Lu Xin also fell silent. He sat quietly in the dark office, his whole state was very strange.

"You all know what happened later..."

Teacher Xiaolu stroked his face lightly, and said in a low voice: "No one has ever blamed me."

"Everyone looked at me full of apology and sympathy, as if I was the one who was hurt the most..."

"but……"

There was a cry in her voice: "I'm sorry for everyone..."

"All of this is because of me, your pain is because of me, all the deaths of children are also because of me, everything you carry is because of me, release the monster in your heart I'm the person, and I'm the one who screwed up everything."

"Over the years, the person who has been afraid to tell you the truth is still me..."

"..."

She looked at Lu Xin, with tears streaming down her face, the countdown counted down quickly, and instantly reset to zero: "I'm sorry, No. 9..."

"Actually, I have always known what you look like..."

"Over the years, I have known it for a long time, but I have never dared to admit it..."

"Because as long as I admit it, it means that I really messed up what happened back then..."

"That's why I've always been reluctant to admit it, and I've always stubbornly believed that you in the orphanage were a gentle child..."

"But now, I can't lie to myself anymore..."

"..."

"is that so?"

Listening to Teacher Xiaolu's words, Lu Xin felt endless confusion in his heart.

In his heart, an extremely complicated emotion suddenly appeared, feeling very sad and painful.

Something that I have been insisting on for a long time seems to be broken in an instant.

I have been working hard, living my life desperately, trying to convey to others that I am normal and getting better.

He thought he acted very well and fooled everyone, the point is, he fooled her.

It was precisely to deceive her that he didn't want to speak out when he knew she had misunderstood.

Only in front of her would he admit that there was something wrong with him and try to heal himself.

But until then, he didn't understand.

It turned out that my efforts were useless, and I had been performing a clumsy and ridiculous performance.

...

...

Boom!

Also at this moment, there was a sudden violent tremor outside the teaching building, and the whole city seemed to be shaking. The next moment, there were screams from the crowd in the distance. A pair of eyes, red and bloody, those eyes are so close to Qinggang, hanging in the sky, looking at Qinggang City coldly.

Hanging in the sky with the red moon, it looks like there are three rounds of red moons.